(Video) What is Emotional Availability Anyway?

In my last article, I spoke about being tired of attracting emotionally unavailable men.

I received many questions about the topic. What do I want from men? Is it all his fault? And most of all: what does it mean, to be emotionally available of unavailable?

To me, emotional unavailability is not, like, a judgment towards this particular man (and men before him). But a mismatch in what our desires are when it comes to emotional/physical/etc availability. And that mismatch, because I wanted more than he, felt like a lack/unavailability to me. What I want to say, is that the amount of availability we all need differs and that it can feel like unavailability to the one with the larger desire (and overwhelm for the other one).

I’m now learning to see that I long for what feels like availability for me, having certain desires when it comes to seeing someone and that his (perceived) unavailability might just not be enough for me. And maybe letting go and finding someone who is more into (meeting) me is the most loving thing to do.

“Our session still vibrates in all my cells! You manage to create a safe and intimate space in which I can open up and connect to parts of myself that I haven’t felt or seen in a very long time and that I never learned to appreciate or love. I didn’t know these parts of myself at all!

Which is a shame, because this part of me is all about surrender, spontaneity, lust, being free of shame, enjoying unconditionally and feeling allowed and worthy enough to be there. You enable and support me to discover and explore these parts of mine. Thank you!”

Do you want to dive deep into your personal process of intimacy, love and relationships? Book an (online or offline) individual session with me. Sign up for my newsletter to be the first to know about new projects and read unpublished material, and check my calendar for upcoming events in Europe!

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