Body Hair and Curves: What a Real Woman Looks Like

Body hair

There are so many social conditioning around sexuality, our bodies, our looks, how we present ourselves both to others as well as to ourselves. While shedding layers of all this, it’s so interesting how we can re-discover ourselves every day again. Take the body hair thing. When you think about it: how weird is it that hair on a man’s body is often considered sexy (look at the whole beard hype happening at the moment), while the hair on a woman’s body is often considered groce. I mean, WTF? And then the whole body size thing. Women should have flat bellies and perky boobies and all that. Because that’s what a woman is supposed to look like. Well, I don’t…

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The Longing for Big Love

Alphachanneling

It’s okay to long for Big Love, dear. To feel that trembling longing in your belly that lets you know, from deep inside, that this is something real this Big Love is something that exists and it’s there, for you, too. To feel that overwhelming sadness in your chest that heart-shattering contraction of feeling that it’s out of reach just the tiniest bit. To feel that confusion in your head Are you ready? Is this the moment? Is there something wrong in my relationship/s? Then remember: Confusion is part of Big Love as it invites you to look deeper into your wounds, your readiness to fully step up for what it is that you want, to not accept, any manipulation,…

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Being a Sexual Person #2

Standing in the middle of an over-crowded train on my way home, another workshop facilitated in Amsterdam behind me. The people in the train discuss fried snacks with huge pupils. So much passion about burgers. Some are wearing sunglasses, even though it’s near midnight. A huge dance event in the city is probably the source of this outflux of people. I’m looking at my own reflection in the dark window. For so many years I thought I was weird and ugly. Sometimes I still do. That underlying belief of being weird. Different. Unwanted. The clumsy one who never wears the right clothes. Will it ever leave? I see a beautiful face, a proud woman wearing an amazing coat. Glitter on…

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(Video) Conscious Relationship Design: Can Relationships be Fluid?

I want more sex in my relationship – now what?

Although there are several shapes of relationships (marriage, dating, polyamory, polygamy) they still seem to be holding on to a fixed construct. Does that make sense, as we are ever-evolving and growing? And: a personal relationship update. Please follow and like us:

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(Video) Conscious Relationship Design: What To Do When My Partner Is Avoidant / Afraid of Commitment?

today I choose to live

In any human dynamic, certain patterns will come up. And those patterns will influence how you feel and how you act. It’s a thing: people with a fear of abandonment attract people with a fear of commitment. This is the anxious/avoidant dynamic we sometimes speak about. Is it possible to avoid this trap, or heal it when we’re in it? Please follow and like us:

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(Video) Conscious Relationship Design: Where do I Base My Boundaries On?

David & Wilrieke

In any human dynamic, certain patterns will come up. And those patterns will influence how you feel and how you act. Where do you base your boundaries and desires upon? And what to do when yours are different than those of your partner? Please follow and like us:

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(Video) I don’t always like my open relationship. And why am I more afraid than my partner?

Open relationships

David and I have an open relationship. For us, that means we are choosing to be primary partners, like in any ‘normal’ relationship. Besides that, we give each other full freedom to openly explore intimacy with others. I’m one of those persons who doesn’t find this just easy. Sometimes I don’t like being in an open relationship at all, but admitting that to myself feels difficult. And how can it feel that I feel like having different boundaries about a certain thing at the same time? How to deal with the insecurity? And why do some people find open relating more difficult than others (and why is it often so that one partner feels more challenged than the other)? These are…

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Why I like Kink and BDSM

Why I like Kink

When I tell people I’m a fan of kink or BDSM, there are usually three possible responses. Many people have no idea what I’m talking about. Others wonder why someone on the path of personal growth would be interested in something abusive and violent as BDSM. And then there are some who understand and are happy to find someone who agrees. Thanks to Fifty Shades of Grey and the many erotic novels that followed in its wake, BDSM – or the SM part of it, has become more mainstream as a flavor in the bedroom. But the picture these stories sketch a very limited, and in my opinion unhealthy, picture of this erotic art form. So what is it that…

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(Video) Two Women Talking about (Open) Relating #1

Wilrieke & May

My dear friend May Rompas and I love to share with each other about our relationships. And as we do that anyway, we thought you might like to be a fly on the wall and listen to our conversations. Here’s the first talk we share, where we talk about what our relationships look like, and how we deal with feelings of insecurity and fear.   Please follow and like us:

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(Video) Is Tantra Still Safe?

After #metoo and #mentoo and #metoointantra, and now Tantra workshops become more abundant than mushrooms in an autumn forest, what to do and where to go? (Little blurb of WiFi challenges halfway, skip to 3 minutes when it starts to bypass..) Please follow and like us:

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