Be your own guru

We all need some guidance in our lives. Especially in times where many things change, it is nice to have a beacon ahead. We may find people in our surroundings or way out of reach to serve as an example. To be our personal guru. What are we looking for? In times of growth we switch from one equilibrium to a new equilibrium.  Between these stable states there is a whole landscape of chaos. We feel insecure and out of balance. We try to get hold of something stable. Someone who seems unbreakable. A superhero. What is a guru? But do superheroes exist? All the people I know face their own challenges. Even the people we value most. They also…

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Love the child in you

Sometimes I feel hurt or frightened in a situation, and I’m not so certain why. There are many emotions flowing through me like a storm, catching me by surprise and leaving me breathless. What happened? Why did this situation touch me as intensely as it did? It feels like the response in my body is in no way corresponding to the intensity of the situation. It feels like the person I am now isn’t the one reacting, but some hidden, core emotion that was stored behind huge walls of defense and ignorance. What happened? Feeling small There is a part of us that never grows up. The inner child in us makes us playful, lighthearted and carefree. But a child…

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Ambiguous answering. Or: why it’s so difficult to understand women

Lately I realized that there are at least three ways in which I answer or react to the same question. Very often I’m not aware that I’m so ambiguous. It´s like there are multiple versions of me that answer in their own way. It happens often when my partner and I discuss stuff that includes emotions, like new steps into our open relationship. He might ask me if it´s okay with me for him to go out with a girl. I tell him I´m perfectly fine, I don´t like it and that it´s up to him to decide what he wants to do, all in a couple of minutes within the same conversation. Next thing is that he tries to…

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Allow yourself to receive

When there’s a friend in need for help, you are there to help out. But can you ask for help when you long for someone to hold your hand? Is it easier to give a present or to receive one? Would you rather clean a friend’s house or ask a friend to clean your house? Can you give sensual pleasure but also receive it with the same ease? In the ideal situation the amount given = the amount received.  When the amount received exceeds the amount given, you withdraw more energy from other people than giving them, leaving others empty and not fulfilled. More often the balance turns to the other side: people tend to give much more than they…

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Being a sexual person

Being a sexual person

A journey towards complete freedom Sometimes I meet people who I consider to be sexual persons. They don’t need to have the looks of a catalog model. It’s about their appearance, the vibe they broadcast. First of all, these people are totally comfortable in the body they are in. I’ve seen them in many shapes, from pretty young girls to chubby old men. Both tall and short, thick and thin. They all had in common that they radiated. Without exception, these people are beautiful. Just plain beautiful. They all live a life in which they follow their heart. Whether they have a job in a library, grocery store, having their own companies or are famous. They do the things they…

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30 days of blogging

I made it! I’ve been blogging each day for the past 30 days. I did it for two reasons: To find out whether I like blogging To give my blog a kickstart and create content quickly Do I like blogging? I was curious whether I would like blogging. I’ve been trying to keep up a blog a couple of times before, but never felt really enthusiastic. Why would it be different this time? This time it’s different for several reasons: I write about my passions. It’s all about my life. It’s a little bit scary sometimes to be really open about the topics I am living. But it brings excitement. It’s releasing to be able to open up. To just…

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Feel like crying

Some days things just don’t work out. Emotions swirl around. They don’t have a clear reason or source. They’re just there. Life seems tough. It makes me feel like crying. What’s wrong? Nothing. Everything. I don’t know! I’m so happy with the life I live. I’m so grateful for the abundance it brings me. Still tears run down my face. I want to be free of worries. Feel relaxed in everything I do. See everything and everybody as a source of blissful joy. See each day as an infinite source of possibilities. Enjoy every split second of it, smiling broadly. That’s not how I feel today. Today I feel there’s not enough. There’s not enough time for me to be…

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Emotions during processes of change

How do you master new habits? How do you grow as a person? There are four steps to take to change yourself: 1. Unconsciously incompetent At first you don’t realize there’s something to change. You lack the knowledge or the experience or the references to be aware a certain habit is not helping you as a person. And since nothing bothers you, there’s no trigger for change. Let’s use the example of smoking. You may be a smoker and be totally unaware of the health risks smoking implies. You have enough money to buy cigarettes and matches, you like to smoke and you love the social interaction with other smokers that smoking brings. Why would you stop smoking if there…

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Do I have to change myself?

There are things I want differently in my life. I want myself to grow and develop. I wish for changes. But changing is something I’d rather avoid. Can I change myself and my life without changing? Guess what will happen when you do what you always did. You get what you always got. If you really want change, you have to change. You have to be the change. But changing is scary! What’s the worst thing that can happen? Your life will change? But that’s what you want! 😉 We all have this imaginary space around us, called our comfort zone. As long as we stay inside that comfort zone, we feel safe. We know what’s in there, we know…

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